How Deep the Father's Love For Us!

How deep the Father's love for us

How vast beyond all measure

That He should give His only Son

To make a wretch His treasure

How great the pain of searing loss

The Father turns His face away

As wounds which mar the Chosen One

Bring many sons to glory

Behold the man upon a cross

My sin upon His shoulders

Ashamed I hear my mocking voice

Call out among the scoffers

It was my sin taht held Him there

Until it was accomplished

His dying breath has brought me life

I know that it is finished

I will nost boast in anything

No gifts, no power, no wisdom

But I will boast in Jesus Christ

His death and resurrection

Why should I gain from His reward

I cannot give an answer

But this I know with all my heart

His wounds have paid my ransom

I was recently asked a question at work by my Christian co-worker (Christian...a term used loosely and I pretty much don't want to be associated with). She asked what about people in remote villages that can't hear about Jesus, how will they be saved. I answered with Romans 1:18-20, "For the wrath of God is revealed from heaven against all ungodliness and unrighteousness of men who suppress the truth in unrighteousness, because that which is known about God is evident within them; for God made it evident to them. For since the creation of the world His invisible attributes, His eternal power and divine nature, have been clearly seen, being understood through what has been made, so that they are without excuse." I also said, we are judged according to what we know. "To whom much is given, much is required."
Then she asked me about Baptism, "Well, if they don't have the bible they won't know to be baptized, so how will they get to heaven."
I was taken aback.
I almost said, who careas about baptism!!?? But I know it is good. I told her the whole shin-dig about baptism, how it's an expression of proclaiming your faith publicly. We had to get back to work, but then I just couldn't stop thinking about her question. It broke my heart. And I believe it broke Jesus' heart.
I can feel Jesus' heart breaking when people think like that. The mercy of God is so vast, so overwhelming, so immense we can't even understand it or explain it. Jesus is longing, with tears streaming down His face, wanting to be with His people...but they are caught up in distractions like baptism... something that was meant to bring us closer to Him, but it is now a blockade.
I can see some of His heart, crying, grieving, in Matthew 18:6, "But whoever causes one of these little ones who believe in Me to stumble, it would be better for him to have a heavy millstone hung around his neck, and to be drowned in the depth of the sea."
How many times have I questioned the mercy of God when it comes to the broken, homeless, hopeless? I think, "How can they fully come to know You, Jesus?" Or I question if people do know Him cause they are still stuck in sin... But God's mercy is greater. In Luke 23:40-43 we see true salvation, the true reality of "how to get to heaven"... "One of the criminals who were hanged there was hurling abuse at Him, saying, 'Are You not the Christ? Save Yourself and us!' But the other answered, and rebuking him said, 'Do you not even fear God, since you are under the same sentence of condemnation? And we indeed are suffering justly, for we are receiving what we deserve for our deeds; but this man has done nothing wrong.' And he was saying, "JESUS, REMEMBER ME WHEN YOU COME INTO YOUR KINGDOM!' And He said to him, "TRULY I SAY TO YOU, TODAY YOU SHALL BE WITH ME IN PARADISE.'"
The mercy of God is that none would die without a chance to cry out in the midst of drowning, dying in the consequences of our sinful deeds. Jesus accepts all that cry out to Him, all that ask to be with Him. I find it interesting that both the criminals believed Jesus was the Christ, but only one of them repented of his sin and asked to be with Jesus. I want to give mercy to everyone I meet, like Jesus gave mercy to me. I want to stop looking and analyzing every little thing about peoples lives, and give mercy. Mercy to hunt for, look for, ask for, search for, try to find, seek after JESUS and Him alone. To know Jesus and be with Him now and for ever in Paradise.

Psalm 119

1How blessed are those whose way is blameless,
Who walk in the law of the LORD.
2How blessed are those who observe His testimonies,
Who seek Him with all their heart.
3They also do no unrighteousness;
They walk in His ways.
4You have ordained Your precepts,
That we should keep them diligently.
5Oh that my ways may be established
To keep Your statutes!
6Then I shall not be ashamed
When I look upon all Your commandments.
7I shall give thanks to You with uprightness of heart,
When I learn Your righteous judgments.
8I shall keep Your statutes;
Do not forsake me utterly!
B Beth.
9How can a young man keep his way pure?
By keeping it according to Your word.
10With all my heart I have sought You;
Do not let me wander from Your commandments.
11Your word I have treasured in my heart,
That I may not sin against You.
12Blessed are You, O LORD;
Teach me Your statutes.
13With my lips I have told of
All the ordinances of Your mouth.
14I have rejoiced in the way of Your testimonies,
As much as in all riches.
15I will meditate on Your precepts
And regard Your ways.
16I shall delight in Your statutes;
I shall not forget Your word.
G Gimel.
17Deal bountifully with Your servant,
That I may live and keep Your word.
18Open my eyes, that I may behold
Wonderful things from Your law.
19I am a stranger in the earth;
Do not hide Your commandments from me.
20My soul is crushed with longing
After Your ordinances at all times.
21You rebuke the arrogant, the cursed,
Who wander from Your commandments.
22Take away reproach and contempt from me,
For I observe Your testimonies.
23Even though princes sit and talk against me,
Your servant meditates on Your statutes.
24Your testimonies also are my delight;
They are my counselors.
D Daleth.
25My soul cleaves to the dust;
Revive me according to Your word.
26I have told of my ways, and You have answered me;
Teach me Your statutes.
27Make me understand the way of Your precepts,
So I will meditate on Your wonders.
28My soul weeps because of grief;
Strengthen me according to Your word.
29Remove the false way from me,
And graciously grant me Your law.
30I have chosen the faithful way;
I have placed Your ordinances before me.
31I cling to Your testimonies;
O LORD, do not put me to shame!
32I shall run the way of Your commandments,
For You will enlarge my heart.
H He.
33Teach me, O LORD, the way of Your statutes,
And I shall observe it to the end.
34Give me understanding, that I may observe Your law
And keep it with all my heart.
35Make me walk in the path of Your commandments,
For I delight in it.
36Incline my heart to Your testimonies
And not to dishonest gain.
37Turn away my eyes from looking at vanity,
And revive me in Your ways.
38Establish Your word to Your servant,
As that which produces reverence for You.
39Turn away my reproach which I dread,
For Your ordinances are good.
40Behold, I long for Your precepts;
Revive me through Your righteousness.
V Vav.
41May Your lovingkindnesses also come to me, O LORD,
Your salvation according to Your word;
42So I will have an answer for him who reproaches me,
For I trust in Your word.
43And do not take the word of truth utterly out of my mouth,
For I wait for Your ordinances.
44So I will keep Your law continually,
Forever and ever.
45And I will walk at liberty,
For I seek Your precepts.
46I will also speak of Your testimonies before kings
And shall not be ashamed.
47I shall delight in Your commandments,
Which I love.
48And I shall lift up my hands to Your commandments,
Which I love;
And I will meditate on Your statutes.
Z Zayin.
49Remember the word to Your servant,
In which You have made me hope.
50This is my comfort in my affliction,
That Your word has revived me.
51The arrogant utterly deride me,
Yet I do not turn aside from Your law.
52I have remembered Your ordinances from of old, O LORD,
And comfort myself.
53Burning indignation has seized me because of the wicked,
Who forsake Your law.
54Your statutes are my songs
In the house of my pilgrimage.
55O LORD, I remember Your name in the night,
And keep Your law.
56This has become mine,
That I observe Your precepts.
C Heth.
57The LORD is my portion;
I have promised to keep Your words.
58I sought Your favor with all my heart;
Be gracious to me according to Your word.
59I considered my ways
And turned my feet to Your testimonies.
60I hastened and did not delay
To keep Your commandments.
61The cords of the wicked have encircled me,
But I have not forgotten Your law.
62At midnight I shall rise to give thanks to You
Because of Your righteous ordinances.
63I am a companion of all those who fear You,
And of those who keep Your precepts.
64The earth is full of Your lovingkindness, O LORD;
Teach me Your statutes.
T Teth.
65You have dealt well with Your servant,
O LORD, according to Your word.
66Teach me good discernment and knowledge,
For I believe in Your commandments.
67Before I was afflicted I went astray,
But now I keep Your word.
68You are good and do good;
Teach me Your statutes.
69The arrogant have forged a lie against me;
With all my heart I will observe Your precepts.
70Their heart is covered with fat,
But I delight in Your law.
71It is good for me that I was afflicted,
That I may learn Your statutes.
72The law of Your mouth is better to me
Than thousands of gold and silver pieces.
Y Yodh.
73Your hands made me and fashioned me;
Give me understanding, that I may learn Your commandments.
74May those who fear You see me and be glad,
Because I wait for Your word.
75I know, O LORD, that Your judgments are righteous,
And that in faithfulness You have afflicted me.
76O may Your lovingkindness comfort me,
According to Your word to Your servant.
77May Your compassion come to me that I may live,
For Your law is my delight.
78May the arrogant be ashamed, for they subvert me with a lie;
But I shall meditate on Your precepts.
79May those who fear You turn to me,
Even those who know Your testimonies.
80May my heart be blameless in Your statutes,
So that I will not be ashamed.
K Kaph.
81My soul languishes for Your salvation;
I wait for Your word.
82My eyes fail with longing for Your word,
While I say, "When will You comfort me?"
83Though I have become like a wineskin in the smoke,
I do not forget Your statutes.
84How many are the days of Your servant?
When will You execute judgment on those who persecute me?
85The arrogant have dug pits for me,
Men who are not in accord with Your law.
86All Your commandments are faithful;
They have persecuted me with a lie; help me!
87They almost destroyed me on earth,
But as for me, I did not forsake Your precepts.
88Revive me according to Your lovingkindness,
So that I may keep the testimony of Your mouth.
L Lamedh.
89Forever, O LORD,
Your word is settled in heaven.
90Your faithfulness continues throughout all generations;
You established the earth, and it stands.
91They stand this day according to Your ordinances,
For all things are Your servants.
92If Your law had not been my delight,
Then I would have perished in my affliction.
93I will never forget Your precepts,
For by them You have revived me.
94I am Yours, save me;
For I have sought Your precepts.
95The wicked wait for me to destroy me;
I shall diligently consider Your testimonies.
96I have seen a limit to all perfection;
Your commandment is exceedingly broad.
M Mem.
97O how I love Your law!
It is my meditation all the day.
98Your commandments make me wiser than my enemies,
For they are ever mine.
99I have more insight than all my teachers,
For Your testimonies are my meditation.
100I understand more than the aged,
Because I have observed Your precepts.
101I have restrained my feet from every evil way,
That I may keep Your word.
102I have not turned aside from Your ordinances,
For You Yourself have taught me.
103How sweet are Your words to my taste!
Yes, sweeter than honey to my mouth!
104From Your precepts I get understanding;
Therefore I hate every false way.
N Nun.
105Your word is a lamp to my feet
And a light to my path.
106I have sworn and I will confirm it,
That I will keep Your righteous ordinances.
107I am exceedingly afflicted;
Revive me, O LORD, according to Your word.
108O accept the freewill offerings of my mouth, O LORD,
And teach me Your ordinances.
109My life is continually in my hand,
Yet I do not forget Your law.
110The wicked have laid a snare for me,
Yet I have not gone astray from Your precepts.
111I have inherited Your testimonies forever,
For they are the joy of my heart.
112I have inclined my heart to perform Your statutes
Forever, even to the end.
S Samekh.
113I hate those who are double-minded,
But I love Your law.
114You are my hiding place and my shield;
I wait for Your word.
115Depart from me, evildoers,
That I may observe the commandments of my God.
116Sustain me according to Your word, that I may live;
And do not let me be ashamed of my hope.
117Uphold me that I may be safe,
That I may have regard for Your statutes continually.
118You have rejected all those who wander from Your statutes,
For their deceitfulness is useless.
119You have removed all the wicked of the earth like dross;
Therefore I love Your testimonies.
120My flesh trembles for fear of You,
And I am afraid of Your judgments.
W Ayin.
121I have done justice and righteousness;
Do not leave me to my oppressors.
122Be surety for Your servant for good;
Do not let the arrogant oppress me.
123My eyes fail with longing for Your salvation
And for Your righteous word.
124Deal with Your servant according to Your lovingkindness
And teach me Your statutes.
125I am Your servant; give me understanding,
That I may know Your testimonies.
126It is time for the LORD to act,
For they have broken Your law.
127Therefore I love Your commandments
Above gold, yes, above fine gold.
128Therefore I esteem right all Your precepts concerning everything,
I hate every false way.
F Pe.
129Your testimonies are wonderful;
Therefore my soul observes them.
130The unfolding of Your words gives light;
It gives understanding to the simple.
131I opened my mouth wide and panted,
For I longed for Your commandments.
132Turn to me and be gracious to me,
After Your manner with those who love Your name.
133Establish my footsteps in Your word,
And do not let any iniquity have dominion over me.
134Redeem me from the oppression of man,
That I may keep Your precepts.
135Make Your face shine upon Your servant,
And teach me Your statutes.
136My eyes shed streams of water,
Because they do not keep Your law.
Q Tsadhe.
137Righteous are You, O LORD,
And upright are Your judgments.
138You have commanded Your testimonies in righteousness
And exceeding faithfulness.
139My zeal has consumed me,
Because my adversaries have forgotten Your words.
140Your word is very pure,
Therefore Your servant loves it.
141I am small and despised,
Yet I do not forget Your precepts.
142Your righteousness is an everlasting righteousness,
And Your law is truth.
143Trouble and anguish have come upon me,
Yet Your commandments are my delight.
144Your testimonies are righteous forever;
Give me understanding that I may live.
J Qoph.
145I cried with all my heart; answer me, O LORD!
I will observe Your statutes.
146I cried to You; save me
And I shall keep Your testimonies.
147I rise before dawn and cry for help;
I wait for Your words.
148My eyes anticipate the night watches,
That I may meditate on Your word.
149Hear my voice according to Your lovingkindness;
Revive me, O LORD, according to Your ordinances.
150Those who follow after wickedness draw near;
They are far from Your law.
151You are near, O LORD,
And all Your commandments are truth.
152Of old I have known from Your testimonies
That You have founded them forever.
R Resh.
153Look upon my affliction and rescue me,
For I do not forget Your law.
154Plead my cause and redeem me;
Revive me according to Your word.
155Salvation is far from the wicked,
For they do not seek Your statutes.
156Great are Your mercies, O LORD;
Revive me according to Your ordinances.
157Many are my persecutors and my adversaries,
Yet I do not turn aside from Your testimonies.
158I behold the treacherous and loathe them,
Because they do not keep Your word.
159Consider how I love Your precepts;
Revive me, O LORD, according to Your lovingkindness.
160The sum of Your word is truth,
And every one of Your righteous ordinances is everlasting.
E Shin.
161Princes persecute me without cause,
But my heart stands in awe of Your words.
162I rejoice at Your word,
As one who finds great spoil.
163I hate and despise falsehood,
But I love Your law.
164Seven times a day I praise You,
Because of Your righteous ordinances.
165Those who love Your law have great peace,
And nothing causes them to stumble.
166I hope for Your salvation, O LORD,
And do Your commandments.
167My soul keeps Your testimonies,
And I love them exceedingly.
168I keep Your precepts and Your testimonies,
For all my ways are before You.
: Tav.
169Let my cry come before You, O LORD;
Give me understanding according to Your word.
170Let my supplication come before You;
Deliver me according to Your word.
171Let my lips utter praise,
For You teach me Your statutes.
172Let my tongue sing of Your word,
For all Your commandments are righteousness.
173Let Your hand be ready to help me,
For I have chosen Your precepts.
174I long for Your salvation, O LORD,
And Your law is my delight.
175Let my soul live that it may praise You,
And let Your ordinances help me.
176I have gone astray like a lost sheep; seek Your servant,
For I do not forget Your commandments.

How Could You?

Lately, everything is so overwhelming. It's overwhelming in a different way. The world is so bright, every sense is heightened. Every person special. Every breath fills up my chest, filling me until I explode. All the swirling, white clouds are moving and changing like my thoughts. I think about life; how can it be so good?
I've often thought of my life as lame. I expect too much I guess. I think about "Where much is given, much is required", and I in reality, I've got it all. But I want to give so much more. I want to live so much more. Can I live like my heart says? Can I be all the crazy things I want to be?
I've heard it said, you choose your life. Many times, as it seems, we can't... We feel stuck, trapped. But the reality is WE CAN CHOOSE. Whose to say we can't do everything we want? The good man, Jack, says that. Who says I can't go do crazy things like live in Sudan, and love war torn beautiful people, or who says I can't live in North Omaha and love hopeless, desperate people? So far, I am the one saying it, cause I am the only one not doing it.
Just when I am about to be utterly discouraged.... GRACE comes and whispers
"For I am confident of this very thing, that He who began a good work in you will perfect it until the day of Christ Jesus." "Those whom I love, I reprove and discipline; therefore be zealous and repent." Jesus loves me!!!
That day is coming... do you feel it? I do. Do you hear the groaning?

I'll leave you with my inspiration...

Upside Down ~ Jack Johnson
Who's to say what's impossible?
Well, they forgot this world keeps spinnin'
And with each new day, I can feel a change in everything.
And as the surface breaks, reflections fade,
but in some ways they remain the same.
And as my mind begins to spread its wings,
there's no stopping curiosity.
I want to turn the whole thing upside down.
I'll find the things they say just can't be found.
I'll share this love I find with everyone.
We'll sing and dance to mother nature's songs.
I don't want this feeling to go away.
Who's to say I can't do everything?
Well, I can try.
And as I roll along I begin to find
Things aren't always just what they seem
I want to turn the whole thing upside down.
I'll find the things they say just can't be found.
I'll share this love I find with everyone.
We'll sing and dance to mother nature's songs.
This world keeps spinnin' and there's no time to waste
Well it all keeps spinnin', spinnin', 'round and 'round and
Upside down, who's to say what's impossible and can't be found?
I don't want this feeling to go away
Please don't go away
Please don't go away
Please don't go away
Is this how it's supposed to be?
Is this how it's supposed to be?

Nicaragua ~ the land I love!

If hell was personalized...my hell would be cold, windy, frozen, icey. So basically it would be like today. When the snow comes, I think happy thoughts. I think of a place where "the beer flows like wine, and the women flock like the salmon on the island of capastrono" --No actually, I think of Nicaragua.
I think of all the beautiful green hills, the smelly cars, and the heat. The heat that makes your clothes stick to you or right when you get out of the cold shower; you sweat instantly. Some of my favorite times was when I would take a siesta and lay in bed with the fan blowing on me full blast. It still didn't help, but to think about that heat, makes me smile.
I know I was born to live in a hot place. Because I love it!
I am just waiting for Jesus to send me to the Middle East, Carribiean, or Central America. Anywhere hot, basically.
This is a random blog.

I miss the people. I miss the relationships that I made there. But I was so encouraged that no one forgot me. If anything, I made MORE friends by leaving and coming back. Even the random guys in the market that I never officially met, they came and hugged me when they saw I had returned. It was great! What sweet, caring and authentic people. I am so blessed that they still write me, they still care, and still pray for me. I pray for Nicaragua. Father bless them with your presence, Rain down your love over Nicaragua. I pray for the children living in the streets, washing car windows... Bring them out of the poverty. Would you change me, so I can believe You and by your authority, "Go and make disciples..."

Thank You for Your Mercy, Thank You for Your Blood, Thank You for Your Love!!!

So I have to tell you...

As my Dad was trying to open up his Oreo bag; He says, "No wonder these are low-fat, I can't get them open."

He is hilarious.

Making a Difference...

"The Lord works in mysterious ways"....actually I don't think He does. I think He usually tells us what's going on; the key is to listen....and watch the news. A couple of friends, Nathan, Carla and I, decided we should go and pray in North O. In response to lots of promptings from Holy Spirit (It might not be gramatically correct but I find it weird to say "the" in front of H.S., if He is a person in the trinity, why do we say "the" Holy Spirit...like we don't say "the" Betsy?) Anyway...back to the story, Carla and I saw the news Friday night and they asked for volunteers on 24th and Lake to go search for Amber Harris whose been missing since last November. We decided to take up the opportunity to invest in our community by going to the search.
Now, God doesn't work in mysterious ways, but God is funny. On the way down to North O, we were discussing possible things people might ask us. We took in to consideration that we might be the only white folks down there (We weren't by the way). One of the questions Nathan thought of was "What made you guys come down here?" None of us were sure of the correct response. Later, while we were filling out papers down on 24th and Lake in the OOIC building, a camera man started filming us and asked "so what made you guys come down here?" So, I suppose the Lord was trying to prepare us!
This was a serious thing, we were searching for articles of clothing, books, shoes, or even...body parts. Wow, it was intense. But just like intense situations overseas, it brings in the joy of the Lord, and we were able to enjoy ourselves. Carla and I were on the same team, while Nathan was in another. While searching, we met Jerry and he was hilarious. He found some nice glasses. There is a lot of junk out there (not at Grampies though, but that is a different story).
Besides all the treasures, FOX 42 shows up, and well...long story short, I get interviewed. Ya, we did the whole "walk and talk" gig. I had my 2 minutes of fame on T.V. (so does that mean I still get 13 more minutes someday?)
All in all, it was an extremely fulfilling day. Praying in North O and helping out our city.
Following Jesus is so rewarding, fun, and random.

As Jerry called them..."Safety Goggles"

Afterwords, we thought we'd pose in good 'ol Benson

It's always good to be patriotic and have an extra purse